It's no secret of mine that music is probably my first and my biggest love and it's something I feel ridiculously protective over because for me it's very sentimental.

I'm going through a time in my life where I don't really know whether I'm coming or going and due to this I'm trying to pick the music I'm listening to very wisely because it's going to stick with me and remind me about this moment for a long time.

I find it amazing how I can listen to Mumford and Sons' first album and I am automatically transported back to Summer 2012, it's half 6 and I'm on the bus on my way to Thorpe Park. I hear A Thousand Years by Christina Perri and I am 18 years old in the dance studio at college overpowered with a feeling of happiness that I am finally getting the hand of dance. I can hear September by Earth, Wind and Fire and I am reminded of every childhood barbecue. I hear Sugar, We're Going Down and I'm on someone's shoulders at my very first festival.

I can't listen to any of these songs the same as I first did, and I wouldn't want to. These are just some of the most treasured memories. 

Music is so powerful because it is something that can touch every emotion and every feeling. But it's also something that can make you feel. As I've grown I've started to really listen to the lyrics and take them in, Kodaline's last album absolutely ruined me and my heart because I really felt the pain he was feeling looking for the woman, but I also felt extremely angry towards the woman for not being in love with him. But I also felt the happiness in Nina Nesbitt's Stay Out because it's relatable and it's fun. 

Music is something which can relax us, prepare us, make us curl up in a ball of completely depression and cry or make us want to dance our arses off, you get your beyonce on! It's something which we can  be completely obsessed with or something that we don't want anything to do with. It's something which occasionally we need to help us get through the bad. People look up to creators of music to save their lives. It's something truly magical and it's something that is never going to fade and that's hard to find.  

I studied Performing Arts/Drama and Performance for 5 years straight so it's fair to say it sort of runs my life. I know I'm not the only musical theatre freak out there and there is literally nothing better than sitting in a dark room and killing your lungs to Wicked. - Tell me I'm wrong.

With this in mind I've managed to put together what I personally believe is the ultimate Musical Theatre Playlist. 

Oh whats this?

Bloody hell, Beth you've really gone all out with this new layout of yours.

Ok. I know, I know I'm a pretty crappy blogger. 

But as you can see, we've a new layout, which I managed to fit.. All by myself. (Though I have that massive grey/black box which should be at the bottom of the page, if anyone can help me with that please please please comment below)

But things are changing. I'm stepping up my game. I'm not gonna do weekly blogs anymore, one will be blogging whenever the hell I please!  

I'm going to get myself a job and I'm going to buy a blogging camera and it's all going to be very fancy.

Please, don't give up on me just yet because I can promise you there are a dozen things coming your way.

xoxo

So I've always been a bit of a self confessed geek when it comes to games and cartoons and everything like that. My older brother is massively into games so there was definitely no escaping it when I was younger. I'm actually really into consoles and stuff, despite being ridiculously old school - I'm still playing the Nintendo 64  Super Nintendo so, that says a lot really.. 

Growing up Pokemon was huuuuuge in our house, we had the games, the cards, soft toys we'd watch the program even a board game. It was something that we all enjoyed and that's really rare. 

SO! Flash forward all these years and you can only imagine my excitment when we heard the game was coming out, an opportunity to live out all of our childhood dreams. Unlike others, I waited until the game was actually released (I was petrified of being blocked haha). 

Honestly, this game is the best game I have ever played. To be honest since uni ended I was in a real down state and it sounds sad but I really feel that this game has actually given me a real purpose. I walk at least 7K a day now and I'm feeling so much better about my health because of it. Everyone is hyping over this game, it's really taken over the world. I feel the media is trying to somewhat tarnish this and I have no idea why. 

It's bringing people together in a time when everything is so fucked up which is absolutely fabulous, why should people be shamed for having fun? 

Go get 'em! Catch them all!

A sentence I am damn sick to death of hearing. 

As you're all aware I finished my degree in May and to be honest since then I have been in a little bit of a mess. 

To be completely honest I feel lost. I don't know whether I'm coming or going. All the universities my friends attended provided them with the footage and information on how to become an actor and they were given a lot of guidance and they were all signed up to the Spotlight website. Whereas my  university didn't even provide me with any footage of me acting so I could create my own showreel. I feel I recieved zero guidance. I went to see a Careers Advisor who basically told me to find friends in the industry and basically use them. I felt so down and depressed because I had no idea how I was going to achieve the goal that I've been working towards for the last five years and I'm good and I enjoy. 

The pressure I felt to get a job was absolutely ridiculous, especially since no-one at the university didn't tell us how we could break into the industry we wanted to. I felt that when I left college at 19 I was taught and guided far more into future life. I decided I was going to work in an office/reception type setting and then after 6 months decide whether I was going to go travelling or whatever. I feel I just need a bit more time to decide. 

Then came the job interviews. Since leaving uni I feel like I've had a thousand job interviews and not one has been successful. It's left me feeling so down and depressed. I feel like I've completely wasted three years as I feel less employable now than I did in the first place. I am completely stuck in a rut. My main goal is obviously to become a performer and hopefully when I do start earning I can invest a portion of my money into showreels, acting videos and things like that. 

SO. Truth be told. I have no plans. I am only 22 and I don't think anyone knows what they really want to do at this age. Unless they're particular lucky or super talented and already have their spot.

I think the pressure on young people is outrageous and it needs to stop.